Who Comes Up With This Stuff and Why Won’t They Stop?

by Lorna's Voice
I wonder if we could get a puppy to help raise money for this campaign...

I wonder if we could get a puppy and a kitten to help raise money for this wordy, um, er, worthy cause?

We’re “word people,” right? Bloggers, writers, readers–we live for words and words live through us. It’s fair to say that people and words have a vested interest in each other (if words were able to think on their own, which sometimes I think they do, especially when they decide not to cooperate with me).

Because you’re like me–a “word person”–I bet you find certain buzz words or even non-words that become buzz words kind of, well, annoying. And I’m not even talking about horrible grammar, which is a good thing, for obvious reasons.

Well at least my last sentence wasn't as worse as this.

Well at least my last sentence wasn’t as worse as this.

Here are some of my picks for the top Drive-Me-Up-The-Wall Words/Non-Words of 2012.

“Fiscal Cliff.” So here’s the thing. “Cliff” is a place, like someplace you’d rather not drive off of or crazy adventuresome people like to climb up? “Fiscal” has something to do with finances, but whose? That’s anybody’s guess. Why am I constantly bombarded by these two words as if they have anything to do with one another?  Can people just name national crises by jamming two words together? If people can make up inane conditions, why aren’t we discussing the obvious ethical sinkhole in government?

Well, it's a start. But I don't think it's big enough...

Well, it’s a start. But I don’t think it’s big enough…

“Epic.” Remember when “epic” meant heroic, majestic, or impressively great? Maybe even just a really, really long poem? I just heard it used to describe how bad a cartoon was. “Well, that was an epic fail.” Huh?

“Humblebrag.” Yup. People are using this new word to describe the act of trying to sound humble while really bragging. “I really wish I could respond to all of my Face Book, Twitter, and blog followers, but I just don’t have time, what with all the charity work I do. I almost wish I was like you and wasn’t so popular.”

“TLDR.” This stands for too long, didn’t read.  If you already knew that, I’m giving you the Stink Eye right now.

TBYS. Don't know what this mean, Too-Busy-For-The-Rest-Of-Us? Ha! It means Too Bad, You're Screwed.

TBYS. Don’t know what this means, Little Ms. or Mr. Too-Busy-For-The-Rest-Of-Us? Ha! It means Too Bad, You’re Screwed.

“Trending.” This is just another noun that has been verbified. “What’s trending on Twitter?” If you would have asked that question five years ago, someone would have probably whisked you off for a psych evaluation. Think about it.

“Hashtag.” Remember when the “#” was the symbol for the pound? Not the currency in the UK, but for the weight that we don’t want to gain any more of than we already have. Now we actually say “hashtag” like we say “dot,” “quote, unquote,” and “at” (@). Period.

To this I say, "Poppycock!"

To this I say, “Poppycock!”

“YOLO.” It’s bad enough that people are using an abbreviation for you only live once, but YOLO has also been verbified. “It’s a beautiful night for YOLOing.” This makes no sense on so many levels that I don’t mind that this sentence makes no sense.

If you only live once, then you don't need us. And, trust us, People, you need us.

If you only live once, then you don’t need The Ghost Busters. And, trust us, People, you need The Ghost Busters.

In honor of the TLDR crowd, I’m stopping here. But I have a so many more pet peeves in the Butcher the Language Department.

I’m sure you have your favorite love-to-hate words or phases. What are they? Now is your chance to cleanse your linguistic soul!

Let's hear it, People!

Let’s hear it, People!

Oh, and Happy New Year! Thanks for all your support and I look forward to another wonderful year ahead for all of us!


9 Comments to “Who Comes Up With This Stuff and Why Won’t They Stop?”

  1. Thanks, Lorna, you made me smile on this dreary morning.

  2. According to my hip younger brother, another word making its way around the internet right now is “swag”. I’m still not entirely certain what it means, but if you encounter someone with a lot of poise/skill/zany clothing, you say, “Swag overload!”

  3. Learned something here. But as I loathe most ghastly aberrations of our language. And as for American spelling … I guess I had better not go there 😉

    • Well, we had to distinguish ourselves from the “Queen’s” English, so we messed with the language–and a few other things as well. We’re a young country. Forgive us our trespasses. I trying! 😉

  4. Thanks for bring me up to “speed”. 😉

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